So SHE says….


TouTarot can’t seem to understand that life in this dimension has a rhythm of molasses. Everything moves ponderously and exacts EFFORT which entails a passage of TIME. Her world is built on the Narnia construct. She flits in,  broadcasts her ideas and expects results the next time she reappears. time-watches

The trouble is that her timing is very unpredictable in this world. If you have read the Narnia series by C.S. Lewis you will understand. If not, the closest approximation would be the telescoping of time in our dreamworld. Or maybe, you have lived through an event where time seemed to stand still – like the last 5 minutes before lunch break ? Or time just hurled on by and even disappeared…You look out and see that the sun has also disappeared and your cellphone informs you “lost” several hours or even  most of the day? Of course, SHE has her own agenda and was very busy getting her life organized and I was expected keep up on her time… But for now – she will have to be patient. Yeah, right! Just like fire is patient….

The big news is that TouTarot is finally ready to introduce her young brood. And now  I have a new problem. What is the collective noun for a group of ? Let’s see….Hmm….Alright. The Phoenix of the Western world is male and there is only one at a time. So that doesn’t help. What of the Phoenix in the Far East? Well, there it has morphed into the female principle and consort to the male Dragon. And there, too, there seems to only be one. So back to the thesaurus and lists of collective nouns. Actually there are some for “mythological creatures” Did you know that a group of dragons is called a “dignity of dragons”? Looking through these, there was nothing.

So it seems that I need to come up with the term. Back to those lists. Hmm. Owls => a parliament. Too serious…. Hummingbirds => a shimmering. Now that has possibilities. Firebirds do sort of shimmer…  Eagles => convocation. Almost as bad as parliament…. A charm of finches. Yes, firebirds are charming but not cute nor small….A party of Jays. Noisy and raucous. Not enough dignity….Dignity? Already taken…

“Enough already!” You heard that, too? good. Now you see how it works between TouTarot and I.

“We are a treasury. Not a family. Not a flock. And certainly NOT a dignity! Hrmph!” 

And she’s gone! Well, at least that puzzle is solved. And so you now know that I am dealing with a Treasury of Firebirds. I guess we will have to wait for these fledglings to fly in …  mary


And so the time has come…

StoryTelling…. to speak of many things and to claim our place in the world! The birds are born and ready to fly and the human has finally figured it all out! Until the next time her Inner Hermit claims custody, that is. Social? She is not. But then we, zhar-ptisi, also tend to be reclusive. So I guess we are well suited to coexist in harmony…. Maybe?

While she was working it out, I have been busy! You see, our kind are not males and we do not regenerate by burning ourselves up! How absolutely insane! We are civilized and if you noticed, I use the plural.  For there are many of us in different parts of our world between the West and the East. And if you want to know more, she is onto that. So stay tuned. This is TouTarot signing off…..

TouTarot - Firebird head


TouTarot-the Firebird


WowFactorYes, well. It took this human a long time to get the hint. In fact, I had to practically sit on her head before she finally got it! As it happens, I spent her life time playing hide-and-seek. She heard all the stories Granny used to read to her and then dreamed and dreamed about me. But as my consort, Puff, discovered, little humans try to grow into what their adults teach them and so they close off the wonder of life for the allure of the virtual world. That was hard to take.

As her world became busier and busier, she didn’t quite forget this realm (I made sure of that). She had her own children and was again immersed in our world for a while. Nudging her along, she became a semi-resident here. I hope you understand that luck is not quite so whimsical as THEY suggest. She became first a teacher and then a LIBRARIAN. Oh, Puff was ecstatic! He could push his agenda (and mine as well, all things considered). And so, she became: Keeper of Imagination and Purveyor of Stories. I must admit, he did a great job. True, I was there, too: in the stories; in the pictures that would show up randomly on the screen; in helping her healing during a major health crisis and in the theme of a graduating class that gifted me to her library. And there I was visible but not seen for about 10 years! Boy did I ever have to practice my Zen. I even practiced that tarot card of Odin hanging upside down from the tree….

But all of this was worth it. I am now released and can spread my hard earned wisdom with clarity to all who wish a different perspective and a new vision of life. Time to push back the limits we are lead to believe is our fate. Let us grow our wings and fly to beyond the sky, to the Seventh Realm beyond the Seventh Sun; to where dreams are a reality; where honey flows freely and where we are all blessed and peaceful. Are you coming?

Toutarot – The human aspect


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snowy-owl-Once upon a time, in the days of young children in the house, I read the Phazeseries by Piers Anthony. This world was divided into two distinct and mutually exclusive parts. The rational and scientific  was kept from the magical and fantastical by a barrier appropriate to that side. For some reason the “rational” protagonist breached this barrier. In learning to negotiate the “other side” he discovered that the people here had different aspects. At times they were human. But then they would appear as natural or even mythical creatures. This really caught my imagination. And so, when I moved from being a classroom teacher to being a school librarian, I adopted this idea.

You probably have noticed that many libraries seem to have owls in the office, logo, wall or some other visible spot. Naturally, since Athena, the Goddess of Wisdom, is often represented by one. Don’t we often say: “wise old owl”? Besides, I was a Brownie once and then became a leader: Snowy Owl; Tawny Owl and Brown Owl. And even Malak in Beavers. So for sure, there was a natural creature about me. The Snowy Owl was almost always part of my life.

How many can even imagine the days of purple mimeograph sheets? Well, in those days, I had to send out “home-made” Overdue notices.  How does one make these “fun” and yet serious enough so that the child (parent) takes action? I came across a few interesting dragons: a sad-looking one (1st notice); one with a few smoke tendrils from his nostril (2nd notice); a startled and smoking dragon (3rd notice) and a full blown, fire breather for libdragona final notice. I started using these. Donn Kushner published “The Book dragon” around this time. And now I had a title for my mythical aspect as well! The Book Dragon was a wonderful custodian of all the library treasures (in both the noun and verb sense!). He loved the different libraries we worked in. But then he became restless and needed new places to go. You do know that “dragons live forever, but not so little….” (Puff, the magic Dragon). And so I moved on as well, feeling bereft. I lost my magical being and my need to be the guardian of the  young and a custodian of accumulated wisdom and knowledge.

Not for long! Not two weeks after saying goodbye to my 40+ year career in schools, a new creature appeared, one that has patiently waited for her time and my “maturity”. This one is not about guarding and protecting but, about spreading the riches of that knowledge for the benefit of the “realm”. And so, TouTarot was born…

Welcome to the TouTarot-verse


The time has finally arrived. The trumpet sounded and the call was so overpowering that I had to leave the comfort of my secret world and confront what others call “reality”. But fear not! This is not a blog about finding my definite purpose. Nor is it a blog about the intricacies of tarot. You see, my restless spirit wants to investigate everything and figure out nothing less than how LIFE works. And, like any good explorer, scientist, philosopher or questing being, I need to find a way to consolidate my wild observations, crazy conclusions and  random questions that come up. Welcome to my universe where the tarot breathes and lives; where connecting the dots challenges science; and pragmatic spirituality questions religious orthodoxy. Let us fly together. Question, respond and share your opinions but keep them clean and constructive. Let us confabulate*!

*PS: To confabulate = 1. to exchange viewpoints or seek advice for the purpose of finding a solution to a problem (according to: